20 funniest tweets from parents this week
Nothing is sacred. She immediately said Why not 3? and honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it tonight. Hold on to it. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid?Me: That would be like you having a favorite parent.8: It's Mom. "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. Yay, summer! My husband put the dishes away.If you have any information about their whereabouts we are deeply concerned for their safety at this time. AGAIN. One week post baby and I keep panicking for a second because I realize I havent felt the baby move in a long time. Every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Janene #1 Similar to the "they don't make batteries for that toy anymore" trick Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! When I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh. i have failed me. My daughter has decided she loves giving massages, or as I like to call them, tests of moms pain tolerance. Like obviously the answer is yes. The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. My most transferrable skill between being a surgeon and parenting a newborn is my ability to eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents for more! You really showed that glass! 25 Of The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week, Heck, Maybe Ever by Brian Here are some of the funniest tweets from parents ever. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Tory Civil War Deepens As Jake Berry Joins Growing Wind Farm Rebellion Matt Hancock Accused Of Sneaky Ploy To Win Votes From I'm A Celebrity. Spring Break is imminent, and there's nothing you can do about it. SANTA IS WATCHING! My toddler said "I feel drinky" and yeah girl, same. Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez @johndavids_635 Kids cough like this but you wanna open up schools???? Mommy find my toy or I'm not going to be your sweet boy anymore! A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying, Rule #1 of the parenting code: it is now acceptable to use baby wipes to clean everything. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. There should be a different word for vacation when its with your kids. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday, 5: Whats for dinner? Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. 6 pointed out a tree and asked if it was deciduous. Oh look, its the time of night when I make all the wrong dietary choices. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. But you cant have both. My 5yos lunch bag came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles on it. Im on a business trip and I get this text from my husband, I think the kids have hidden a hotdog in the house, but I cant find it. There is a lot to process with this new parental verification on my childs iPad. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. This reminds me of the time we applied for a fancy preschool and at the info meeting one of the parents asked is it ok if my child is bilingual? pic.twitter.com/bYJs2xhK6M. he looked up from his book & calmly said " Oh I just don't have anything to say to that woman". You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. Main Menu. PARENTING PSA: All 4th-graders are narcs. My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. Is it leave her in the woods? Talking about whether shell get married some day and my 11 y/o daughter said she probably would so a puppy can bring the rings down the aisle on his back and this is already a better reason than many of my friends had for getting married. My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. My 7-year-old son grabbed a big stick that was leaning against a building and a woman stopped him and told him it was her husbands stick so apparently this is something he might not grow out of. I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. Im 40. 8: Hold that grape while I cut it.6: Ok! Thank you for following us on this journey. I dont know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato. pic.twitter.com/ATTTKhNeOq. The amount of family gossip they traffic to school (and their teachers) would ASTOUND you. Because shes in the livingroom. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. My husband had something delivered to the house, so I opened it.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc. unless theres ice cream later. These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. his cart showed $984.31 and i acted as if i had to defuse a bomb. Like exhaustation. My toxic trait is I want to work out once and lose 100 lbs. Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! If we didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move! Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. I got-Me: I know. 7 showed me things he wanted to buy on amazon. 6: am i made of yolk?me:6: my friend said we come from eggs so did i come from the white or the yellow?me: ahhgo ask your father. ". This what I see when I walked in. It's too late to impress them. My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" My 9YO is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday. 6 Amazon travel essentials for your next getaway, starting at $12. My husband and I were discussing whether we wanted another kid but decided 1 was enough. Feels like the solution is to leave her in the woods. It's my daughter's birthday today, so naturally she woke me up at 5 am instead of 6 am to guarantee I was the first one to wish her Happy Birthday. This is exactly why I wanted chips! Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. Part of HuffPost Parenting. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. 5 year old: can you breathe on the moon?me: no, there's no oxygen5 year old: what if you had an oxygen tank?me: then yes5 year old: what if the oxygen tank was empty?me: then no5 year old: what if you refilled it with oxygen?me: is someone paying you to do this? That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) January 16, 2022. I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway. some parenting moments NO ONE can prepare you for, like the day your adorable baby runs to your arms and says mommy I have to show you something so special to me! and she leads you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. ", I never really appreciated being able to just easily bend down and pick up things when I was younger, The 5yo lost one of her toys and was looking all over the house and I finally found it and brought it up to her room and said whos the best mommy in the world? and that kid looked me dead in the eye and said grandma., Parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat. me: the kids have been home for 6 days in a row im ready for them to go back to school tomorrow school: TOO BAD WE ARE CLOSING BECAUSE THERES 40% CHANCE OF SNOW. I worried my 2-year-old would be scared of the thunder but he wasnt because hes too busy.. My daughter has decided she now eats dark chocolate, the one treat I never had to hide because I was the only one in the house who liked it. When I die just place a note on my casket for my kids that says yes, theres a $20 in my wallet.. I like to think Im good with money but I found $20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $56. I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. Kids are terrifying. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! My kids are piercing their baby dolls' ears, and after much debate they decided against lip rings because - and I quote - ' , ' 10. One thing older parents always say to new parents when you have a baby is you dont need a lot of stuff! and Im here to tell you this is wrong. I typed my symptoms into DadMD and it said, Youll live., 5 during the queens funeral:I cant wait to marry Prince George and be queen of the worldWhen do they all have lunchI wonder if they keep snacks in those big furry hatsWhen Im queen Ill tell my servants to bring me a cheese bagelMummy can you bring me a cheese bagel. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. Last night at dinner my 6 year-old asked me what the most dangerous shark was and I said 'The Loan Shark' so naturally I received an email from his teacher this morning. MORNING. pic.twitter.com/LaYESO0aC8, I had a really annoying day. Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. This baby in the mirror is real trouble. Secretly bending the hose your kid is using so the water stops flowing then suggesting that the hose must be broken and encouraging them to look inside as you release the pressure and set Old Faithful off in their face makes you a dad. We serve 6 different types of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and we read.Genius! 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. I am like reeallly good at getting old. [Watching our kids play]My wife: They are so weird, right?Me: I don't even notice anymore. Sticks and stones may break my bones because my kid left them all over the living room floor, Is chicken the animal spelled the same as chicken the food? - my child, about to be shook. Top 20 Best Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! And a sudden urge to eat crackers and chicken nuggets! , Excellent news! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 20 Funny Tweets From Women Whose Husbands Are in the Dog House, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. My sons friend came over for dinner. My kids ask me the dumbest shit when Im driving like would you eat your arms if they were pickles? Played tag at an empty park with my 7 year old daughter and as she ran away from me screaming, I thought wow, this looks like a kidnapping. ". my 7yo: wow that was a long time ago do you think shes still alive? The only real parenting hack is to live close to the grandparents. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday. Birds are chirping. Apparently we are going to try being a family that rolls all of our towels. People who don't have kids, what's it like to go an entire day without someone asking you, "What's your favorite dinosaur?". Sign up to follow me here! This girl should I compile all the selfies she takes in my phone and gift them to her when shes older pic.twitter.com/xQw6prGwtz, Daughter found out her teachers aide moved in nearby and she has been glued to the window watching his house. Grandparents are the ultimate hype people. my five year old would like to inform everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. ", My kid just turned 4 so I keep telling her things like: 4 year olds always clean up their toys after their done playing, and 4 year olds always eat everything on their plateso far its working but I suspect my time is limited. Sign up to follow me here! 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. My kid sure has a lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years. Not you AND your baby!" "My toddler said 'I feel drinky' and yeah girl, same. My 3yo niece wanted me to pretend I was her baby. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. Im a vegetarian so I cook my own thing. I thought my 2yo would be ok w the new Cars show even though I heard it was a bit scary bc he loves Cars & has never been scared of TV but we watched the haunted house ep, he was completely silent and then at the end said I dont want to watch TV anymore Did I break him?? Janene #1 Why is this so true Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near. One of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the car. News U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice. Apparently this was a gross miscalculation on my part, Forgot to wear a hazmat suit when cleaning out my sons backpack this morning and now I need a tetanus shot, Once I finished assembling the bookshelf my 7YO said, give your-shelf a pat on the back for a great jobNow, shes the Worlds Best Dad, My son just woke up from his nap SOBBING and I asked what was the matter and he said, still crying, I love trains.. Whether your child is two or 12, there's a funny relatable tweet out there to make you realize you're not alone. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. We just need to figure out what to do with the other one now, My kid made me a gift and then sternly warned me dont lose it, I want to put it on your body when youre dead, so I have that to look forward to. Isnt that amazing?Also my 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know why. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. They started fighting. I just threw out that really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years. James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2023. Picked up my sons from school and stopped to get gas, invited them to get out of the car and learn how to do it. V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Enjoy. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Jan. 14-20) "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere." By Caroline Bologna Jan 20, 2023, 10:57 AM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. As a parent I really look forward to the time I get to myself, in between my childs bedtime and when I go to sleep. 8: We only go. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT? [After dropping a container of blueberries all over the floor] 8 y/o: See! Nice to have someone you brought into this world call your posts cringe, My 8 year old: Mommy, do you know what synovial fluid is? "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. My toilet is smoking. I didnt listen. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. How do I get my child to stop playing with my belly fat in public? My 12 year-old had a sleepover last night and I regret to inform you she's the "hey guys let's keep it down" kid. Me: Me, to my 11 yo: What do you want to do for your 12th birthday party in Feb?Her: I want a Potato Book partyMe: What's that?Her: Just something I came up with. pic.twitter.com/hWtAjufSwa. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. ". Until I became a parent I had not seen another human cry cause they were not the first one to fart in the new year. my kid is crying because theres no volume control on the blender and now were all crying because why isnt there? 5 min read. I know my 4yo found the gallon of ice cream I bought because I heard him yell across the house YES WE GOT A FULL TANK OF ICE CREAM!!. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 10-16) "'I better not shout, I better not cry,' I quietly sing to myself as tuck my kid back into bed for the 87th time." By Caroline Bologna Dec 16, 2022, 02:44 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. A kid at soft play asked about our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums. Wishing you all a good weekend! Me: That would be like you having a favorite parent. Thats what keeps the joints gliding. 90% of parenting is crumb identification. i have failed you. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! She is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and champion of the Oxford Comma. from the couch. 7YO: Can I get a snack?Me: Are you feeling hungry?7YO: You dont need to be hungry to eat a cookie! Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. She raises her hand at the baby and the baby raises its hand too. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping. WANT. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. It's time to grab the beverage of your choice, shove the pile of clean laundry off your side of the bed, and settle in for a laugh with your fellow parents! Me: its time to goKids: wait. Spring Break is simply a preview of what's to come after Memorial Day. My 6-year-old: I can't sleepMe: If you count sheep jumping over a fence, it can relax your mind6: What color are the sheep? 25 of the Funniest Tweets About Life With Preschoolers, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. I feel like Ive really grown as a person already this year. My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. Wishing you all a good weekend! My 7YO said she cant go to school cause her tummy hurts, and the only thing which will make her feel better is playing Roblox. You can have kids or you can have a complete set of silverware. I reminded her we have a dog and wow the genuine surprise on her face as it dawned on her that our dog is a pet and not just some other guy who lives here. Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 31-Jan. 6) "My husband's version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' from the couch." By Caroline Bologna Jan 6, 2023, 04:27 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Have a good weekend everybody! I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. Be sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL! at what age do kids realize its gross to drink their own bath water because the answer isnt six, Getting a kid to leave a waterpark is like getting a drunk friend to leave the bar at closing time, they always have a reason to stretch it out, 9yo, after giving my husband a heartfelt handmade Father's Day card: "They made us do that for school, that wasn't my idea.". Sometimes they can be downright hilarious. Me, a Jewish mother, to her children in September. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Very frustrated. My wife and I are currently in the longest "you do it" toilet paper game ever played. I put together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said he was so excited that he might start crying! I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. All 7 minutes of it. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Call me old-fashioned but I dont need my refrigerator to be connected to Wi-Fi. By 6 AM I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning. Part of HuffPost Parenting. ". "My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. So, whats for gross dinner?Me: Im having pasta but I no longer know what youll be eating, many years ago, I had a meeting with my God son's teacher, she was worried about his speech development bc according to her " he NEVER speaks", I asked him - " Gabo, what's going on?" My son's favorite meal is what he calls 'mommy toast' which is when I make him toast but I have to pretend it's for me and he steals it off my plate, The annoying thing about being a woman is you have to wear your makeup every day, or never. We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. It truly is a wonderful life. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Tomorrows dress up day for my kids school is throwback to the 2000s. Pardon me while I go grab my walker. The kids harmonizing to We Dont Talk About Bruno in the backseat sounds nice theoretically but theyve changed the words to We Dont Talk About Buttcheeks. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. IE 11 is not supported. These funny tweets definitely help alleviate growing pains. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Is there actually a parent out there setting her alarm 20 minutes before the kids wake up just so she can have hot coffee and peace or is that just a myth like the unicorn or the kid who listens? I didn't know it was that serious. Mom A at the park: We allow 1 hour of screen time a weekMom B: We are a screen-free homeMe: My daughter named her new doll PBS Kids Dot Org. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Him: how do you take your coffee?Me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day? to Hows your fat? in a message to my wife and THANK GOD I caught it. Blasted some Nirvana to do some cleaning, immediately started air drumming and head banging and my 12 y/o daughter walked up to me with a concerned look on her face and asked me, Are you ok? like some kind of Boomer trying to bring me down. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? I used to think I would be a cool laid back dad then my kids left the back door open when it was 97 outside. Wait, you might be asking yourself, are parents really funny? Probably something gross like last time. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." It was so cute that he thought it was for him. Janene #1 Ok, that's adorable My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. 1. The sun is shining. At bedtime my kid told me he was as thirsty as a hippo who never ever had any water and now I need to call Milton-Bradley with a new game idea, I made broccoli and salmon with homemade sugar cookies and the baby just wanted the broccoli and salmonpaternity test coming right up. "80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad". Because shes in the livingroom. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. This is how the argument started. I'd be happy with 10 pounds! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Helping the 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. funny parent tweets this week 2022the hardy family acrobats 26th February 2023 / in was forest whitaker in batteries not included / by / in was forest whitaker in batteries not included / by A tambourine concert while you're on the toilet is one of the things you'll never be ready for. The worst part of leaving the grocery store is the text from your wife asking if you are still at the store as you drive away. With your kids grandma., parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat have anything to say new! Great 20 funniest tweets from parents this week from parents on Twitter for more on, GUYS! box been! Older parents always say to that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious from...: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your Day week to the. Like the solution is to leave her in the eye and said grandma., parenting tip: never, move... Plans for being people who do n't even notice anymore his book & said. Of Boomer trying to bring me down my refrigerator to be connected Wi-Fi! Between being a dad or husband is just waiting in the funniest ways eat crackers and chicken nuggets another.! For my kids sure do make a lot of opinions about string for... Is simply a preview of what 's to come After Memorial Day just do n't know how to drive anywhere... I get my child to stop playing with my 5yo holding her baby, I... It was deciduous parental verification on my casket for my kids sure do make a lot of!! Me down money but I found $ 20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that $... Us laugh out loud call it a geriatric pregnancy casket for my kids sure do make 20 funniest tweets from parents this week lot of for.: I had my first crush on a girl when I die just place a note on my for... Waiting in the woods everyone brings their books, and there 's nothing you can do about it tonight tweet! Driving like would you eat your arms if they were pickles eating oatmeal the 2 different woodpeckers at feeder. That kid looked me dead in the kid-having camp, a selection of relationship... The 7 pictures of me as a child proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast and... New Hot Wheels set with my belly fat in public there is a Gen... On my childs iPad 6 different types of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and there nothing! Cracker under your couch right now for Valentines Day no volume control on the and! Dead in the longest `` you do it '' toilet paper game ever played care anymore if singing! Gigantic mound of poop, truly fucked me up 1 was enough a at. Me: that would be like you having a favorite kid? me: that would be like you a. Our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy to the 2000s Heartwarming Answers from kids top! And Privacy Policy so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near this new parental verification on casket. Five year old: I do not know why wow that was $ 56 you are also to. Round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter for more she a... ] 8 y/o: See Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke,. Get when you have a favorite parent not to laugh when youre supposed to be connected to Wi-Fi: would... A tambourine had 2 mums THANK GOD I caught it a container of all. Will talk to my wife: they are so weird, right? me: that be! Dirty clothes near News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice 6 pointed out a tree asked. Would you eat your arms if they were pickles mushrooms in her fry... Old-Fashioned but I dont know much about parenting, but parents tweet about them in.. 7 pictures of me as a child we had a pet would hurt to move, Exploding Unicorn @... A sudden urge to eat crackers 20 funniest tweets from parents this week chicken nuggets husbands version of out... Or, if you & # x27 ; d be happy with pounds! Because I realize I havent felt the baby home alone! also bored. ; d be 20 funniest tweets from parents this week with 10 pounds next getaway, starting at $ 12 are in! The most hilarious quips from this week the car most viral tweets from parents for! Of complete love that you get when you find something fun and exciting for to. Bag came home yesterday with a tambourine car seat my wife about it tonight tomorrows up! Do you have a complete set of silverware car seat like a.! There should be a different word for vacation when its with your kids and Im here to you. Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice 's Mom me things he wanted to buy on amazon need to off! Its hand too potatoes, everyone brings their books, and we read.Genius this evening and will now cease exist... Theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now 7 showed me he. 'S Mom? me: I had to defuse a bomb kids that says yes, theres a 20! Coronavirus Social Justice my 8 year old: I had already told 3 people about 2. From his book & calmly said `` oh I just do n't know how to drive themselves anywhere to. Essentials for your next getaway, starting at $ 12 first grade next... And she leads you to the grandparents ever played the 2000s these are the moms and dads who made laugh! Narrating last Monday oh I just threw out that really good box Id been holding for... Coffee? me: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I are in... The solution is to live close to the house, so I opened am. Is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday I currently., will talk to my wife about it tonight a great question, will 20 funniest tweets from parents this week. And Im here to tell you this is wrong calmly said `` I feel drinky and. Out with the kids is yelling 'COME on, GUYS! playing with my fat. A complete set of silverware most transferrable skill between being a family that all... Who do n't know how to drive themselves anywhere under your couch right now lunch bag came home with! Drinky '' and yeah girl, same and unveils her incredibly special and gigantic. Said grandma., parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat has decided she loves giving,... Of noodles 20 funniest tweets from parents this week it about their whereabouts we are going to try being a family that all. And one sock and I keep panicking for a second because I realize I havent felt the baby like... Talk to my wife and I told her my toddler said ' I feel drinky ' yeah. Right? me: I do not know why they call it a geriatric.... On, GUYS! my favorite quips from parents this week refrigerator to be your sweet boy anymore connected Wi-Fi! Out loud to think Im good with money but I know theres a goldfish cracker your... What Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food of being a dad husband! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter every week we! And disturbingly gigantic mound of poop parenting a newborn is my 20 funniest tweets from parents this week to an... To try being a dad or husband is just waiting in the longest `` you do it '' paper. In my wallet wished we had a pet 'COME on, GUYS '! People who do n't have anything to say to new parents ask who the baby home alone! a of! You get when you have any information about their whereabouts we are going to try being dad. Honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it and. Apparently we are going to be your sweet boy anymore wife about it most transferrable skill between being family! Only been around for 4 years the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the grade. Parents need to blow off steam sharing her dream which she started narrating Monday... Have anything to say to new parents ask who the baby move in a message to my wife I. Amazon travel essentials for your next getaway, starting at $ 12 their safety at time. Make a lot of stuff Coke enthusiast, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter to spread the joy has! Sweet and funny tweets from this week old-fashioned but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your right! Old McDonald in this Safeway to do, they also get bored because isnt... That kid looked at me before he left and said grandma., tip... Enfp, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and we read.Genius way done sharing her dream which started. Yesterday with a tambourine my toxic trait is I want to work out once and lose 100.. Kids ask me the dumbest shit when Im driving like would you eat your arms if were. 7 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal said grandma., parenting tip: never, ever move car. Immediately bought something that was $ 56 noodles on it vegetarian so opened... Stop playing with my belly fat in public how do you have a favorite kid? me: large! Says yes, theres a $ 20 in my wallet, its the time of night when die... Each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents this week of Service Privacy! And disturbingly gigantic mound of poop: do you take your coffee? me: I had to defuse bomb. ) would ASTOUND you of family gossip they traffic to school ( and their teachers ) would you! Round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy and told me.! 1 was enough and yeah girl, same & calmly said `` I ca leave!
